I have been trying to write the perfect blog, but the perfect blog post doesn’t exist. Right now I’m going to just be me, Janet, someone who is struggling with life. I’ve lost control of my mental health, my weight, my energy…everything. I recently quit my job for the benefit of my mental health and my weight. Yes, my weight. You see, I’m an emotional/stress eater. I was eating to get through my day because I was miserable. I’m not going to complain about my company or anyone working there. It was just the nature of the job. It’s not me. I feel like I gave it a fair shot, but I just couldn’t do it anymore. There has got to be more than ‘getting through’ life. I don’t want to do that anymore. I don’t want to miss hanging out with my mom and my daughter and my doggies. I want to travel to England, Ireland, Scotland and anywhere else my heart (or daughter) desires. Life is too short to be miserable. I want to hang out with friends or spend time just doing nothing. This world is hard enough without having a job that is slowing sucking the life out of me.
Even though the job was not for me, it did make me realize that I need to do some work on myself. In the previous post I talked about emotional intelligence. This is only the first step I need to take to improve my life, but it is an important one. One thing I’ve known about myself is that I can take things personally even if they have absolutely nothing to do with me. If my sports team loses, I feel like a loser. If someone pulls in front of me on the highway, I take it personally. I seriously think I take everything in life personally, but it’s important to recognize those things that I cannot control. Trying to control what can’t be controlled is the fast track to insanity or at least decreased mental health.
Something else I discovered that I need to work on is processing my emotions. I don’t process what I’m feeling, I stuff my feelings down with food. I want to work on being healthy and emotional eating is not compatible with this goal. Emotions do serve a purpose. They help us navigate life. According to Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence: Why it can matter more than IQ, emotions are impulses to act. That doesn’t mean to act on someone else, but rather for us to take action on our own behalf. For me, feeling miserable and unhappy was meant to get me to leave a job that wasn’t healthy for me. Being exhausted all the time was another indicator that the job was taking a toll on me.
What I find most helpful for me is listening to audiobooks. I love listening while I’m in the car. Also, when I’m doing a little self-care. I’ll put on a hair mask and face mask, lie on my bed and listen to a book. Doing this makes me happy and is also an excuse to practice self-care which I don’t do often enough. A few of the best books I have listened to are:
-> The Mountain is You by Brianna Wiest
-> Good Vibes Good Life by Vex King
-> Atomic Habits by James Clear
-> Essentialism by Greg McKeown
-> Discipline is Destiny by Ryan Holiday
These books are even better when you listen a second time. Sometimes I need to hear something more than once for it to stick in my mind. And now that I have some time away from work, I want to focus on putting many of the ideas I’ve learned from these books into action. Listening is great, but apart from action is pointless.
Lastly for today, I’ve also been taking an online course, Professional Life Coach, which I’m taking mostly to improve my life, but hopefully I can use what I am learning to put in my blog. Right now I am working on setting goals. One of my biggest goals is to help people who are struggling with life like I am. Even if I help one person, I’ll have reached my goal.
~ Blessings, Janet
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